Days in the life of Nobody

Have just been plain too attached lately =(

Winter retreat was great. Stayed there from Wednesday onwards, and helped to prepare things for the arrival of the 60+ people who came! ~ must be some kind of UNIBUDS record I think! Yet somehow there is an empty feeling left over .. like something is still not complete, something left unsatisfied .. clinging to something, but I dunno what.

Now I’m reading the Dalai Lama’s quote on my noticeboard:

"For people to focus on "my life", "my life" destroys the capacity for compassion. From that perspective, a small problem appears to be a gigantic problem and only brings more unhappiness, frustration, insecurity and fear."

Contemplating that makes me feel better already. But if not my life, then whose life? And how to help them? Where to lead them? These thoughts are weird … maybe not helpful .. but still, I get them all the time. Maybe Phra Mana is right: thinking is the problem. If we didn’t think, would things just come naturally? Sometimes I think ‘yes’. Sometimes I think ‘no’.

I am at a loss. My head is pulling me in one direction now, but my heart doesn’t want to follow. Should I go travelling with my brother at the end of this year? Maybe not … but I have cancelled these things before. He will enjoy showing me around. I will probably enjoy it once I get there. But my heart doesn’t feel like travelling anymore.

This entry was posted on Sunday, July 8th, 2007 at 6:14 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.